Desired Constellation
by Artemis Noir
Summary: This is a yuri ShizNat story. Shizuru is holding a Hime reunion but will Natsuki show? Of course she does. Sequel to Lips which I have Loved. Story complete, with angst, love and lemony goodness.
1. Palmful of Stars

This is the sequel to "Lips which I have loved." That does not need to be read first to understand this story.

I don't own Mai HiME.

Thanks Rhythia deLoux for beta'ing this chapter.

This takes place after the bathroom scene in the extended version of the ending.

**Desired Constellation**

Chapter One: Palmful of Stars/Throw them like Dice

You acted so casual to see me sitting in your bathroom naked, but I know you better than that.

In the past you would have made some smart ass remark about the situation, and then possibly sauntered over to me and made some flirtatious gesture. But things have changed in the past two months the HiME Star had been destroyed.

This weekend was planned out to be a kind of reunion. Most of the former 'gang' made the journey to your family's summer home on the Friday evening thanks to Midori's rental of a large van. Even Haruka came because Yukino wouldn't go without her.

I did not leave with them the day earlier. I told you I had an assignment I had to complete and likely wouldn't make it until Saturday afternoon. That was partially true. While I do have summer classes, my paper isn't due until the following week.

Honestly, Shizuru, I just wasn't certain that I was going to make it at all.

Publicly, you are still the same charming woman who goes along while acting as though life is easy; that you have no worries at all. But I see the cracks, especially when we are alone together.

Initially, after we woke up, you hard tried to act like everything was normal. You would blindside me with affection and cuteness, and I, in turn would respond as I always had-with objections and furious blushing. Then one day, it just stopped.

Certainly, you have plenty of small talk to share with me, but we don't converse like we used to. Even your body language is colder. You no longer hold my gaze for longer than a second. You allow yourself to become distracted or you just turn the other way.

Seriously, I've wanted to smack you upside the head and say,

"Smarten up, baka! What's up your ass?"

But again, I know you better than that. My eyes have been opened since I pulled my head out of my own ass and realized who mattered to me. Sometimes I just need to be reminded of that.

Last night, Mai had called me. In the background I could hear bottles clinking and loud music.

"Natsuki, you should be here! We're having a great time!" and as if on cue, the sound of celebrants yelled out my name followed by more clinking glasses. They were drinking and somebody was requesting more 'magic elixir.' I'm pretty certain it was Nao.

"It sounds like it, Mai, but I don't think I can make it"

She stopped talking for a moment and the phone became muffled. When I heard her voice again, the background was much quieter, as if she had stepped outside.

"Why not, what's going on?" She asked.

"I'm busy."

"Bull crap!" She swore. "You promised me you would make it. I haven't seen you in over a month!"

Oh, I did promise her that.

"Look Mai, I just don't want to come. I don't know that Shizuru even wants me there."

"Riiiight!" She said in her most sarcastic tone. "That's why she keeps looking outside to see if you're arriving. Natsuki, she's like your best friend. Whatever is happening between you two, fix it now. We're hiking at Mount Fuji tomorrow morning, talk to her then."

"But—"

"See you in the morning, bye"

Click.

So Mai is the reason why I woke up at four in the morning to arrive at your place by eight. I had several hours to think about what I would say to you. No, I knew what I needed to say, but was I brave enough was the real question.

When I arrived, a very hung over looking Midori was being buckled into the passenger seat by Yukino and Haruka while a bunch of other former HiME looked like they were also dragging themselves into the back of the van. You were not amongst them.

Mai came out of the driver's seat I guess when she saw me pull in on the Ducati. I parked the bike on the lot and exchanged greetings with the sleepy looking gang and found myself embraced by Mai.

"Hey Mai"

"Natsuki, I'm so glad you could make it…See you later."

"What! Where the hell are you guys going?"

"We" she directed her arm at the van load of girls "are spending the morning at Mount Fuji."

"Bubuzuke jammed out!" Haruka piped in.

"No, she's just staying behind to make us some lunch for when we get back."

"So she's where?" I spoke in my most annoyed tone.

"She's still sleeping. She probably hasn't heard you come in since she wore ear plugs." She leaned into me and whispered. "It was a noisy night."

"Hey, shut up!" The eldest of the group grumbled in the van.

"Midori snored really loud after she passed out," Mai whispered before continuing. "Anyway, Shizuru is still not expecting you until the afternoon, but you can still keep her company since the van's jam packed."

"Ooo-kay"

"Great! Bye"

"Bye!" Several voices called out, and then I was alone. Not truly, you were inside.

I'd been to your family summer home before, I knew my way around.

I opened the doors to the bedrooms to figure out where I would be sleeping. Specifically, I was looking for Mai and Mikoto's room; I was thinking to bunk with them. Conveniently, theirs was across from yours. I dropped the small overnight bag on the floor before I crossed the hall to your door to announce my presence to you.

A wave of relief rushed over me as I saw that you were still asleep. Does that make me a bad person, Shizuru that I want to delay what was to come as long as possible?

I still had to smile when I saw you. This was not the super-composed Shizuru Fujino that people normally saw. You were sleeping on your stomach with your head partially hidden by pillow. Your hair was unruly, and even though the room was dark, I could make out the orange earplug sticking out of your exposed ear.

Perhaps you'd had too much 'magic elixir' last night so I wasn't certain when you would be waking up. I decided to help myself to some cereal in the kitchen before I went for my shower. It was my own fault for forgetting to lock the door behind me.

"ACK! Shizuru!" I shrieked, looking back at you.

When you walked in, I was sitting naked in front of the mirrors; I must have looked so vain. The truth is that I actually was kind of admiring the view. I'd just gone through a growth spurt that saw me rise in height about 5cm and grow in the bust about the same.

You glimpsed me briefly before you turned around.

"Ara, ara, when-when did you arrive?" You spoke as I grabbed my towel from the rack next to me and covered myself. "I wasn't expecting you until this afternoon."

"About an hour ago!" I said more curtly than I intended to. I forced myself to calm down so I didn't sound so rude. I softened my tone. "The girls were loading into the van when I got here. So I guess it's just you and me"

"Oh." You replied and turned your head back to look at me. "So they did leave without me. I thought the house was a little too quiet this morning."

Mai. So this was your plan. The others must have been in on it to have agreed to go 'hiking' early in the morning with hangovers. Baka.

"She said they would be back for lunch so…" I didn't know what to say next. But you didn't let the silence linger for long.

"Natsuki, I'm going to use the shower downstairs. Take all the time you need in here. I just need to grab my shampoo, alright."

You walked to the shower and pulled out two bottles then stopped to look at me for a moment. You looked like you wanted to say something, but you briefly shook your head as if you had changed your mind.

"Shizuru?"

"I have to go" You said and walked quickly out of the bathroom. I felt like I should chase after you, but I didn't. Instead, I dropped the towel and walked into the shower and let my thoughts flow beneath the hot stream.

I would talk to you as soon as I was fresh.

I saw two endings to the scenario in my mind. The first was that I say the right thing and then we go back to being in a good place. The second, I fuck it up and we mutually agree to stop being friends...

That idea actually caused a pang in my chest. I don't have a lot of people in my life who are close to me; I did not want that to be the conclusion.

I pressed my head against the white tiled wall and sighed heavily.

"I won't lose you Shizuru"

It was then that I resolved that I would do whatever it took to keep you in my life.


	2. Make it Right

**Desired Constellation**

Chapter Two—Make it Right

I ran from you Natsuki.

You seemed about to say something to me. Perhaps this was the moment you would tell me that you no longer desire for us to be friends. I have been avoiding being close with you for a little while now. I had tried going back to what we used to be, but I am not the same person anymore, and neither are you. It feels like we've been going through the motions, but in my heart, I ache for you. But you know that now.

My shame is no longer a secret.

I waited a while before turning on the shower. I decided that I would tell you I had a bathroom emergency so this is why I fled. That could have been the truth, couldn't it have been, Natsuki? We had several hours remaining that it would be just you and I. I could have used this excuse again if it came down to it.

It would not have been a complete lie to say that I was feeling off. In fact, my entire being was shaken. I was utterly shocked to see you sitting in my bathroom, and of all things naked. I was actually under the impression you were not going to make it at all this weekend after Mai walked out of the party last night. I suppose my hunch was wrong, because there you were.

I turned around quickly, but I still caught a glimpse of you. I found it difficult to speak after that. Your body had developed quite a bit, and you were so beautiful. I only wished to tell you this, but I was not ready to face your rejection so I ran. I'm a coward.

I did not do anything in the shower to ease the tension in my body, but gods, I was so sensitive. If I had been able to use the upstairs shower, I would have access to the shower massager and been able to manage myself quickly.

It did not help that my thoughts were stuck on the idea that you were upstairs, naked washing all the parts I longed to touch. Maybe you knew what to do with a shower massager Natsuki…

_Stop it!_

I did not leave the shower feeling any cleaner.

After I was dry, I put on my silky purple bath robe and with as cool a head I could manage, I made the walk back up the stairs to get dressed. I couldn't hear you stirring, so I imaged you were in Mai and Mikoto's room taking a nap. I figured it was safe to assume you would want to share accommodations with them since you and the Tokiha girl had become quite good friends this past school year.

Relief prematurely washed over me at the thought that the morning would be an easy one and I opened my bedroom door-

Ikezu Natsuki!

There you were, in a white t-shirt and brown shorts, sitting on the edge of my bed!

I felt my jaw drop but I quickly closed it. Something had to be up.

"Natsuki, is everything all right?"

Your body language was not relaxed. There was that slight frown in your face, the one that you make when you're about to leave your comfort zone. The last time I saw it, you were about to tell me you loved me, and then you killed me. It was everything I wanted, I died very happily.

You patted the bed next to you.

"Can we talk?" You requested softly. Ara, Natsuki, you can be so cute when you're about to break my heart. I promised myself I wouldn't cry when this happened. I gave you my poker face smile and nodded before sitting next to you by my pillows.

"Is something on your mind, Natsuki?" I said as cheerfully as I could. I pondered bringing up the bathroom incident, but decided I wouldn't lie to you if I didn't need to.

"Shizuru…" your face was a bit scrunched. This was it, I was certain-your farewell speech to our friendship. "I…" _just came to say goodbye. _"I'm sorry."

Not what I was expecting.

"Pardon?" I said confusedly. You are not one to donate token apologies so I wondered what you could have possibly done. "I don't understand. What's wrong?"

"We are." You replied. I turned my face away. So this was the end. I felt more distressed than I wanted to in this moment. I was aching to run away again, but I respected you enough to allow you your full speech. My eyes were stinging.

"Shizuru? Fuck, I said it wrong!" You exclaimed. You were making absolutely no sense to me. My hands were folded in my lap as I faced forward. In a surprising gesture, you grasped my left hand and held it between both of yours.

"Shizuru," I turned to face you again. There was such sadness in your eyes. "I'm trying to say this right. Let me try?"

I nodded. I felt numb inside.

"It's my fault we're like this. I asked you after we returned to life if we could go back to being friends but I knew you wanted more than that. I never gave you a chance. The truth is…"

_You don't like girls. You don't like me. _

You looked down at the bed and took a few deep breaths. You were nervous. I could tell because your hands which held mine were shaking slightly.

"You know that it is not easy for me to trust people. The idea that I could fully open my heart to anybody scares me. I wasn't lying to you when I said that I loved you and I feel…I feel that if I could fall in love with anybody, it could only be with you."

I hadn't realized I was crying until you reached beside me to pull a couple tissues from the box on the bedside table.

Natsuki, you can be so full of surprises.

Tenderly you dabbed at my tear streaked cheeks. I opened my lips to speak…

_Could this be real? Do you want to be with me also?_

But all that came out was a sob.

Quickly, I found myself being held in your arms, my head rested on your shoulders as I cried. You were making shushing noises as you stroked my back. My heart felt overwhelmed; it felt so good to embrace you, to be so close to you, to smell you…your hair was scented by your vanilla and honey shampoo. I inhaled deeply, and I began to feel calmer. I opened my eyes and found you had placed a tissue on my lap which I picked up to wipe my face. My forehead remained leaned against you.

"I was so afraid, Natsuki." I admitted in a quiet voice. "I was so certain that you had decided you were finished with me."

"Forgive me, Shizuru." You whispered and pulled us back. Your deep green eyes were gently upon me, and I knew then that you meant every word you had said.

I couldn't help but smile; you were so beautiful and I was so happy.

It was 9:37 in the morning. The sunshine streamed into the window of my bedroom covering us in golden light. Normally, birds could be heard singing outside on any summer morning, but not today. The thumping of my heart filled my ears mixed with the soft sounds of breath, yours and mine.

My shining angel, Natsuki. "_I will be patient for you, I promise" _My thoughts vowed. If you were to hold me here forever, I would die again happy under your emerald gaze.

My generous, blue-haired goddess-

Then you kissed me.


	3. Murmurs

**Desired Constellation**

Chapter Three- Murmurs

The morning did not go as I had foreseen by any means.

Things kind of spiraled out of control when I saw you beginning to cry. I hadn't intended to reveal so much to you that day; I only wanted to reveal my openness to trying, that maybe we should start dating. The words just fell out of me, but I meant everything I said, Shizuru. I promise.

You smiled at me, even though your eyes were still brimmed with tears. Fuck. I can be such a jerk. I leaned in to wipe away the impending tear drop with my lips which made you smile even harder. You were utterly beautiful. It was not a difficult decision after that to lift your chin with my fingers and well…

It was the start of a really nice time.

Our first kisses were gentle and timid, but became more confident as time went on. I licked your lip and your mouth opened, allowing our tongues to touch one another. I didn't really know what I was doing, I kind of just stuck it in there but you seemed to know what to do with it. It felt really good to kiss you.

Soft, cute noises fell from your throat occasionally. Hearing you, tasting you, feeling you, I found myself nervous as to how into this I was. My thoughts became loud.

_Kissing can lead to sex. Such soft hands, I wonder what you feel like under your robe…_

And alarms started going off in my head that we should stop this immediately. _I am not ready for that, I like you Shizuru but we haven't even gone on a date-_

"I can't have sex with you Shizuru!" I found myself yelling out holding you at arm's length. My face was furiously hot with embarrassment that I actually shouted that out loud.

You looked at me stunned for a moment. I wasn't sure if you were going to become angry with me, or cry again. Of course, it was an option I hadn't considered that came. You covered your mouth with your hand and began giggling. I covered my face with my hands to hide.

"Ara, Natsuki" you sang between giggles. "Is that what is on your mind?"

_What the hell!_

"Baka!" I yelled back at you. "Fuck, Shizuru, I don't know what the hell I'm doing. I've never had a girlfriend before!"

Your giggling stopped.

I uncovered my face and found that you were now looking at me with a thoughtful expression—another word I had not intended to use today had fallen from my mouth. I wanted to smack myself.

"Natsuki," you said with such surprise in your voice.

"Can we talk about this for a bit?" I grumbled before you said something to embarrass me further.

"Of course."

I don't know why I decided at that point to turn around and lay on the bed to bury my face into the pillows. I think I just wanted you to stop looking at me. It seemed that every time you did, I kept on giving more of myself away.

You seemed to take it as an invitation to lie down next to me, but you didn't touch.

_Maybe I wanted you to touch me._

My eyes burst open at the thought and I saw that you were lying on your arm looking at me with doughy crimson eyes. Your free hand pulled the hair away from my face; I could faintly feel the softness of your finger tips.

"Shizuru" I began as you placed your hand atop my forearm. "What are the rules of this?"

"To being girlfriends?" you asked innocently enough except for the longer note on the word 'girlfriends.' You must have been tickled pink to utter such a word.

"Yes. Kissing can lead to…other things."

"Oh." You blushed. "It can. I can't imagine you're ready for things past kissing."

"Right," I said, my face felt hot again. "I'm glad you understand that. So, should we maybe think about going on dates or something?"

"Yes!" you exclaimed happily. "There is a festival Tuesday night if you are available"

"That sounds like fun." I replied. I felt myself feeling calm again.

"Great! So, what do you want to do for now?"

It was not a difficult decision as to what happened next. You wrapped your left arm around my neck as I leaned over to kiss you. Your right hand held my arm. Part of my body partially covered yours; it was a comfortable angle with which to kiss you with.

Someday, Shizuru, I'll tell you what went on in the week prior to this. How it was that I came to the conclusion that being with you would be an acceptable choice.

You are an attractive person, Shizuru, but before a couple of days ago, I wasn't sure if I wanted to be with you as more than a friend. The pervading thought was that someday you would want to be intimate with me, and honestly, the idea of sex in general was not interesting to me-guy or girl. Then I began to wonder what girls did together anyway?

When I was not working on my final assignment, I was using the internet for my latest investigation.

Let's just say, that I'd been looking at my options.

Beneath me, it sounded at first like you were excited before I realized that you were just uncomfortable. The weight of my leg must have been heavy for you as you squirmed to get me to adjust. You didn't say anything; you just kept kissing me, releasing happy sighs into my mouth.

My mind began to wander as we got into a pleasurable rhythm.

During my research, I read 'educational' sites as well as erotica. I looked at 'romantic' encounters in movies as well as sex on porn sites. It was all really gross, but I did learn something, Shizuru-I like the way women look naked more than I do men. They also sound prettier while sexually excited. Kind of like the way you did as we were kissing.

My eyes were closed for the most part, but I opened my eyes as I realized you were no longer kissing me. You were gripping my arm and neck, whispering my name; there was panic in your eyes and sweat on your forehead.

"Shizuru?" I whispered upon your lips just before you arched up to mash your lips against mine. Your fingers ground into my shoulder as your body shuddered; a deep sigh arose from your throat. The moment was brief, and kind of frightening to watch before your head fell back down on the pillow. There was confusion in your face. I was certain I had hurt you.

"Shizuru," I spoke with alarm in my voice. "Are you alright?"

"Natsuki," you breathed, taking in a few gulps of air before you continued. "I tried to move out of the way. I wasn't sure if you were doing that on purpose."

"What?" Then I realized where my body was in context to yours. While my mind was occupied, my leg had found its way in between yours with my thigh pressing against your… "Oh…"

I blushed furiously. I sat up quickly in a thoughtless manner. My thigh again stroked your centre and you involuntarily released a moan.

"_The day just keeps getting better," _I thought sarcastically.

I was on all fours hovering over you. I was afraid to move anymore lest I do something else really stupid.

"So I guess you umm…climaxed." I said shyly as I watched your skin return to its normal hue. You looked up and gave me a brief smirk before you broke out into laughter. I didn't know how to react.

"So it was an accident?" you managed to say as you chuckled.

"Oi." I was majorly embarrassed. "So, was it…okay?"

Why do I ask stupid questions I am not certain I want the answers?

"Natsuki, it was an interesting surprise."

Your eyes were sparkling, like something was on your mind. I cannot deny there was something on my mind as well.

Part of me wished to back off and re-establish the wall I seem to have busted through; that would be the most natural thing for me to do. The other part, the curious teenager in me wished to see what else could happen. I've lived the majority of my life doing what I could to keep people at bay, making the choices that led to the least enjoyment.

My mind went back to a few moments earlier; maybe it wasn't a complete accident. I remember feeling you struggle slightly beneath me. You were still kissing me so I wasn't compelled to move away. I heard you saying my name, but I ignored you the first several times. There was an interesting desperation in your voice I enjoyed hearing. My body quivered at the memory.

From where I hovered, I suddenly became aware of what you were wearing. The way your purple robe was done up, a bit of cleavage was exposed from the top. I suddenly wondered if you were wearing anything beneath it.

My hand travelled down to the length of fabric that tied your clothing to you. It made me feel nervous to do so, but also I can't deny it made me feel powerful. Your eyes were transfixed on my hand which would soon reveal your secrets.

I leaned down as you were still covered and kissed your exposed collar bone softly.

"Natsuki" you whispered, putting your fingers through my hair. I raised my head and looked in your eyes, it was an interesting sight; there are many adjectives that could describe it. I recognized shyness and fear, but there was one more thing. I think it was desire. My hand untangled your belt and I leaned in to kiss your lips-

"**BEEP-BEEEEEP!**"

A Loud horn interrupted. I looked up towards the noise and realized that the early morning gang was returning.

"Fuck," I exclaimed before I found myself knocked off my knees.

You are still crazy strong Shizuru! While distracted, you rose up and flipped me onto my back, grabbing my legs and hoisting them around your hips.

"Ohh!" I called out as you lay down on top of me, pressing your pelvis down in a very sensitive place. Fuck, you felt really good.

You were watching my reaction, your face was flushed.

"Looks like we're out of time," you said with a husky voice. You were holding on to both of my hands.

You pressed them down against the bed beside my head and crushed my mouth with a deep kiss as you continued to grind against me. I knew we had to get up now, I didn't want to be found this way, but more than that-I wanted the intruders to fuck off!

I was breathless as you raised your face from me, but strangely, you seemed more composed-perhaps even smug.

"How shall we handle this My Natsuki," you spoke in a slow, sexy voice. "Do we let them know what we've been up to?"

"No!" I cried out at her tease. "I'll be roasted by all of them!"

You smirked.

"So what is our story?"

"We've made amends. They can figure out we're a couple any other day but when we're all together."

"But you're so cute when you're being teased."

Smiling, you lifted up from me, revealing partially the result of my earlier fumbling with your belt. I got a quick peek of just a bit more cleavage and your tummy…_did you get your belly button pierced?_ My eyes couldn't go lower when I noted something purple and sparkling in that area. The view was quickly _covered_ as you stood off the bed and covered yourself.

"Why don't you go greet them Natsuki. I'll join you in the kitchen once I am dressed. We also forgot to make lunch."

"_Mai can make lunch." _I thought. "_She owes me now for her deception_."

"Fine." I said out loud and proceeded to leave the bed to walk to the door.

"Oh, Natsuki-" I was blindsided. As I touched the screen door to leave, I was once again caught in your arms. You pressed me up against the wall and tortured me with a long delicious kiss.

"It would be most appropriate for you to move your things into my bedroom for the night." You said throatily, making my head spin and knees feel weak.

"Uh, okay," was all I could say. The rest of the day was going to be Hell, I knew.

I was feeling pretty light headed until I reached the stairs and saw everybody start to pile in. It was then that I remembered that I was severely irritated with Mai.

_You better not be looking for gratitude!_

"Honey, we're hooo-ooome!" Midori called out, she was in much better shape than when she left this morning.

"It doesn't smell like lunch in here, I'm so hungry," I could hear Mikoto say to Mai.

"I'm sure that Natsuki and Shizuru had a lot to talk about," she said to the smaller girl before raising her voice, "Didn't you Natsuki!"

"Baka," I muttered to myself then answered, "Of course Mai. Your scheme went exactly as planned."

"Glad to hear it." She said happily, walking towards the kitchen. "I'm going to make lunch now!"

As I walked down the stairs, the anxiety I had at their return began to diminish. Truthfully, I was glad to see all of them, even Nao who for unknown reasons was giving me stink eye.

Mai made a great lunch as usual.

You came downstairs to offer your help just in time for the food to be served. You were dressed now in your purple kimono. You behaved normally, as if nothing had gone on between us a half hour earlier.

For some reason, you sat next to Haruka, who was the most laid back I'd ever seen that tight-ass girl. I was listening to Mai in one ear go on about how they didn't make it to the mountain that morning. They instead found themselves in a quaint village where they shopped and had breakfast.

In my other ear, I was listening in to your chat with Haruka. She was convinced that now that your 'superpowers' are gone she was going to dominate in university. You humored her in that way that drives her crazy, but she sounded excited about the challenge ahead.

And then she said something that caught my ear,

"Fujino, I've never seen you eat so much. Are you concerned with being too thin?"

"I missed breakfast this morning" you admitted. I felt kind of bad until you opened your mouth again. "I imagine this is all I'll need for the rest of the day. I can eat a little something else later tonight."

I think all the colour left my face when you said that and the moisture in my mouth disappeared suddenly, becoming known elsewhere.

"Natsuki. Hey Natsuki, are you alright?" Mai asked at my sudden change in demeanor.

Yes Shizuru, the rest of the day was going to be Hell.

* * *

The story I set out to make in my mind has changed. It was meant originally to end at chapter three, to be just Natsuki outpouring emotions and then they have some really great sex. The problem with that is 1. I've never written a sex scene before so I'm working on drafts to correct that and 2. I think Shizuru would be better equipped to describe what their first time would be like. That will be chapter four.

Chapter 3.5 will be a short bridge between morning and evening as told by Midori, because I love me some Midori because she'll tell it like it is.


	4. On the Table

Thanks CrazyNinja Penguin for checking over chapter 3 and 3.5.

This is significantly shorter than it was to begin with, but I'm happier with the result.

**Desired Constellation**

Chapter 3.5—On the table 

**_Midori:_**

Mai thinks we arrived back at the end of a fight that ended well.

Based on my own experience, I think they were having sex.

Maybe it was both.

I had not seen either of them since the HiME Star was destroyed. Of course it was because I had to fly to Egypt right afterward to be with my sweetheart, the Professor so I could ride him like a camel across the desert.

Mai told me last night as she was formulating her plan that the friendship wasn't the same after Natsuki learned that Shizuru was in love with her. I told her that I was certain that it wasn't a one way thing, again, based on my own experiences, and that Kuga was probably the saboteur of her own love story. She always seemed the sort to me to push away happiness, she just enjoys angst too much. Mai agreed that this was a possibility.

Thinking back on any time I ever saw those two together, they always had a sexual tension between them, and it was extra thick upon our return from our morning drive.

It was clear to me that Natsuki had not looked into the mirror before she came down the stairs. I had to pretend to cough as I suppressed a laugh as she grumpily stomped down the stairs with bed head and lips that shade of red one has when their mouth has been ravished.

I shared this observation with Mai, since this whole getting them back together was her idea, and she didn't see it. She said,

"You really shouldn't talk about that unless you are one-hundred percent certain it's true. People could get hurt with a rumor like that."

_Grrrrr!_

Somebody in the group has to have seen something over the course of the whole day. I can't be the only person here who can feel the vibe in this house!

The poolside, the poolside!

We spent the afternoon in our bathing suits lounging by the pool or swimming. How did anybody miss the sexy black bikini that Fujino was wearing and the 'come fuck me' walk she sauntered outside with? I would have made a move myself, if I wasn't certain this walk wasn't for a certain blue haired chick who I swore I saw having to wipe her mouth to hide her drooling.

When Fujino had found herself a beach chair, I volunteered to apply sunscreen to her back. Happily, she acquiesced since Kuga was too cowardly to ask. I wanted to show her what she was missing.

I told her I was untying the ribbon of her bikini so that I could apply the lotion evenly. The golden fluid was not warm enough, so I rubbed my hands together before placing my hands on her back. Her body was soft yet firm; utter perfection! I worked slowly, starting from the lowest point at the waist of her bikini bottom and made my way up her back.

She sighed contentedly, "Mmh, that's nice."

As I came to her shoulders, I noticed a few kinks. I asked her if it was alright to work them out.

"Thank you, please do." She said and pulled her hair over to one side then sat on her forearms. From where Natsuki was sitting, I'll bet she was getting an AMAZING shot of cleavage. The girl was wearing sunglasses, but her upraised eyebrows expressed interest at what was happening on our side of the pool.

Shizuru groaned loudly as I hit some rough knots.

"Ohhhh, ow. Goooood!"

Damn, that sounded really sexy.

"Ugh! Get a room you two!" Haruka yelled from across the pool as she sipped the Pina Colada Yukino had made for her.

"What does that mean?" Mikoto queried from the pool as she raised her head from the water in time to hear that comment. Mai's mouth dropped as clearly she was the person who was being addressed. I don't think she was ready to have the birds and the bees chat with the little girl yet, so I yelled the answer at them.

"Suzushiro is suggesting that Fujino and I should take a romantic nap together privately." Shizuru laughed out loudly at my comment, I could feel the vibration of her lungs under my hands. Akane and Nao also laughed with her.

"Oh," Mikoto gleamed. "Like the naps I have with Mai."

Tokiha turned as red as a ginger's skin would allow as everybody else who was not yet laughing, joined in. Even Natsuki who likely needed a break from the teasing I was delivering to her.

Good memory, but that's not the point.

It was strange, they claimed individually to have had a good chat and patched things up, yet they didn't really speak to each other the rest of the day. Not that they seemed upset, Shizuru was actually in much better shape than she was last night.

She drank a lot and was not too talkative. Most of her time was spent conversing with Nao when she wasn't doing hosting duties like finding us snacks and raiding her parents' liquor cabinet. A lady of her dignity and grace would not let herself be seen being taken upstairs stumbling at only ten thirty in the evening. Whatever was bothering her last night, clearly was resolved by the afternoon as she was a delightful host. She drank very little alcohol and talked with everybody…Everybody except Natsuki… publically.

There were a few times when I would lose sight of both of them because I'm not a freak. I was at the Fujino estate to have a good time too, not just to snoop.

I did snoop a little bit actually. It was just before dinner when I excused myself to use the washroom upstairs as the one on the main floor was occupied. I didn't actually have to go, but I wanted to look in the bedrooms upstairs to find where Natsuki was going to sleep tonight. This could have been the big clue I needed as to the real status of their relationship.

I didn't even bother trying to go into Mai and Mikoto's room or Shiho and Nao's room, I went straight for Fujino's bedroom.

Wow! Total princess! There's a large glass door looking out upon the east overlooking woodlands, but would certainly receive ample sunshine. There's a balcony on the other side of the door with a small bench. The dusk had made the bedroom too dark to discern colours, but the bed to the left was a queen size with four posts and drapes tied at them. On the right was a dresser with mirror and a screen for changing behind. It had a lovely pattern on it, likely a local artist's work. There are large paintings on the walls which look like scenes in nature. Her room is full of candles. If something hasn't happened yet, it certainly will tonight in this love nest.

BINGO! Kuga's overnight bag was on the other side of the bed.

I swear, by the end of this weekend, I will have absolute proof of this couple-hood! I'll take a picture of them sleeping in the morning before they wake.


	5. Slippery

Thanks CrazyNinjaPenguin again for setting me right.

I know I am meant to put out chapter 4 already, but I need one more bridge character to set up what happens next.

**Desired Constellation**

Chapter 3.5 (b) Slippery

Drunkish girl musings at 11:30pm Saturday Night

There's a wish at the bottom of Midori's Magic Elixir. There has to be, it's the only thing that makes sense.

Last night, Fujino got the last drink from the bottle, and all her wishes came true. I know they did, because I saw them together, Shizuru and Natsuki.

They didn't know I had come in the house to use the bathroom. The door was open, I could hear everything. I was alerted by the sound of a gasp, that's how I knew there were others in the house.

"Be nice, Shizuru. I only came to ask you that." It was Kuga's voice.

"Ikezu, Natsuki. I am always nice to you. See."

Then there were clicking sounds followed by the sound of heavier breathing and moans.

They were kissing, and doing gods know what!

Lots of feelings hit me then, and I didn't know what to do. Shock was there of course, because I never thought they would ever get together. Sadness accompanied shock, because I know it was my fault that things became strained between them...

My fault…

I see that now.

Jealousy. Fujino was getting everything she wanted. She always gets what she wants.

I ran up to my appointed room for the weekend and cried. I didn't understand why at the time, but it gave me time to contemplate the last emotion that was lingering…hope.

The seemingly impossible has happened; it's not too late for me too. I just have to find something at the bottom of the bottle I am slowly trying to finish off whether there are actual wishes down there or perhaps just courage.

I had found some degree of strength at the midway point. Natsuki has agreed to speak with me outside. There were things I needed to tell her.

Please Natsuki, show me forgiveness.


	6. Tricky

Thank you thank you CrazyNinjaPenguin for all your help!

Disclaimer: Nothing about Mai HiME belongs to me.

Reader Warning:

The story is being told in present tense in the first half, but since Shizuru is reflecting often on the day that passed, there is tension switches.

The latter half is only done in past tense.

* * *

**Desired Constellation**

Chapter 4-Tricky

Shizuru: 12:36am

I would have waited forever. I would have been content to hold your hands and accept every kiss your lips granted me, but everything has changed now.

You opened the door Natsuki; the moment is so close I can almost taste you.

Tonight, you belong to me.

I was already so aroused before we actually started talking. Then later, I tried half-heartedly to thwart your body from where it was touching, but you felt so wonderful. When I came for you, my body exploded from within and it seemed to ignite something in you; I could see it in your eyes.

I want to see it again, the look of you burning for me.

And then you were beneath me. I heard the first cries of you in pleasure and I knew that if we only had a little more time…my Gods, I think you would have let me do whatever I wished to you. I have had a long time to think about what that would entail and after a long day's wait, the evening is upon us:

I have retired to our bedroom.

I want you Natsuki.

You have given me no indication that you have changed your mind.

I did my best throughout the afternoon to remind you of our morning. I came to the pool in my most revealing swimsuit with the ambition of keeping your attention, but masterfully you reversed the situation. I hadn't foreseen that you would have acquired a new bikini to accommodate your more womanly figure. It was painfully difficult to not stare at you the whole while with your luscious curves just begging me to touch and kiss them.

That was not your only trick!

When I went to the washroom to wash the sunscreen off my face, I hadn't realized you had followed me. What a lovely surprise to feel you embrace me from behind and pull me to you. Your hand reached for my piercing.

"When did you get this?" you asked in a hushed voice. Your hot breath upon my ear caused a shiver down my spine. I closed my eyes and turned to face you; my mouth had fallen open. I licked my upper lip when your hands grasped my hips and again pulled me close to you. Our faces were inches apart; there was amusement in your green eyes and a sexy smirk on your lips.

"Do you like it?" I said also in a lower voice. Neither of us had our question answered as the distance between us was closed and you pressed your lips against mine; you tasted like pineapple and rum. I wrapped my arms around your shoulders and enjoyed your flavours for a moment before I broke our kiss and nuzzled your cheek.

"Ara, my Natsuki is full of surprises today." My breath must have grazed sensitive nerves around your ear as you inhaled a sharp breath and pressed closer to me.

"Be nice Shizuru," you sighed. "I only came to ask you that."

I held you away from me so that you could see the pout on my face.

"Ikezu Natsuki. I am always nice to you. See." I leaned into your neck and placed tiny kisses down its curve to your shoulder. I followed your shoulder and bent down to follow your collarbone until I reached its centre.

"Shizuru," you whispered. Oh, I loved how you said my name. Your hands fell into my hair as my lips kissed downwards. I dropped to my knees and looked up so I could see your wide-eyed expression. I gave you a wicked grin before extending my tongue and circling around the divot of your belly button.

"Fuck, stop!" you said exasperatedly, pulling yourself back. Your face was in a deep blush. "Seriously, be nice! You make it hard to be near you."

I laughed and held my hands to you to help me stand again. I'm not entirely certain what you were referring to. Perhaps it was when I caressed your leg with my toes under the table at lunch time, or when I came to serve drinks around the pool and 'forgot' which drink was mine. I accidently took a sip out of your glass and since I had just applied lip balm, it left a lip mark around the rim. I didn't think you minded since I saw you that take a drink from where I had sipped.

I embraced you once I was again on my feet. We were then alerted to the sounds of people entering the house; you took a step back. I took that as my cue to leave but I made a point of rubbing my arms against yours as I walked out.

"Natsuki, I promise to be kind"

And soon I will show you how kind I can be. On my knees again, with your smooth tanned thighs rested on my shoulders as you lie on the bed. Tonight, I shall know all of your flavours. My tongue will explore every part of your womanhood, experimenting with pressure and speed to learn what pleases you. When I concentrate on your most sensitive part, I cannot predict what you will say or do, but I promise I will not relent until I have witnessed the sublime moment of your release. I want to hear you say my name again, more than that; I want you to scream it.

It was midnight when I left the party downstairs. There was still quite a bit of activity going on. Akane, who had passed out on the couch was having various things drawn on her in Sharpie pen. Midori herself had drawn two penises starting at her wrists and ending in the palms. Each one said 'Kazuya was here.' Mai and others were playing some kind of karaoke game on the Playstation. A very drunken Haruka was on the microphone singing "The Rose" by Bette Midler, and quite terribly at that. As for you, my Natsuki, you were speaking with Yukino outside by the pool. I opened the door and said goodnight.

"I'll join you in a few moments," you said_. _This was almost a half hour ago.

When I came to my room, I changed into light sleeping clothes, a white tank top and boy shorts to be exact. It was the best I could do since it is not normal for me to bring sexy lingerie to the house my family spends its holidays at. Certainly, I could have been waiting naked, but then I would miss the feeling of having you undress me like you tried earlier. My Natsuki; your body was above mine, your eyes asked me '_May I?"_

What if you had succeeded? Would I know the feeling of soft lips caressing my skin, or a hot mouth clasping onto my breast, kneading my nipple with a warm determined tongue?

I can't take it anymore, I need you NOW! I wonder if I went down and carried you upstairs in my arms to my bedroom it would give away that I was intending on making sweet passionate love to you all night long.

**Knock. Knock**

You have arrived!

The door creaks open and you are there, but you look odd. Your skin is very pale and for some reason your hair is tucked into the white hoodie you had changed into earlier. After you close the screen door shut, you lean against the wall with your palms pressed against it. Something is wrong!

"Natsuki," I am alarmed. I stand and begin to walk towards you, but you hold your hand out in a halting gesture.

"Wait," you say and I stop. You finally brought your eyes to meet mine, they were red…Damn it, you're drunk!

"I'm sorry," you apologize. "I didn't realize I drank so much. I've been in the bathroom for the past fifteen minutes puking."

I complete the distance between us and take your arms. From the strong minty smell emanating from you, I know you at least had the consideration to brush your teeth and use mouthwash.

"Come lie down" I say with much care in my voice, leading you stumbling towards the bed. I cannot deny that I am disappointed that you are sick, but I also hate to see you suffer.

I sit you down on the bed and leave you to find your overnight bag to fetch your sleeping clothes. There is a pair of boxer shorts and tank top. When I return to you, you have already shucked your hoodie onto the floor and had pulled the sheets back, working your way underneath them. You were wearing a gorgeous yellow bra that I wanted desperately to remove from you. I wouldn't take advantage of you while you were ill. Damn it Natsuki! So close yet so far away!

"Natsuki, please put on some sleepwear, you'll damage your lingerie if you sleep in it," I say calmly though my mind was raging.

Without speaking, you hold your hand out to take the tank top and proceed to unclip the bra which clasps in the front. I turn around and try to have unsexy thoughts, specifically, the idea of you heaving your guts into the toilet.

When I hear your clothes fall to the floor, I walk around the bed and turned off the side table light before crawling under the sheets with you. You turn to me and placed your arm around my waist. I returned the gesture and caress your back.

"I love you Shizuru," you say softly. I smile in the dark, touched by your drunken words. I must take consolation in that gesture, it is more than I ever imagined could happen at the beginning of this morning.

"I love you as well—oh!" You place your face between my breasts, your hand on my waist rises.

"Natsuki?"

"Hmmmm soft." You sigh. "Stupid Yukino, stupid drinking game. Damn if I was going to let her get the wish at the bottom of the bottle."

I have no idea what you were going on about. Your voice is progressively turning into a mumble. Unfortunately, sleep is not far behind.

"Did you win the game?" I ask, humouring your topic.

"Nuh-uh. *sigh* Stupid people. We were this close to…" You squeeze my nipple above the clothes for emphasis.

Gods Natsuki, I don't know if I can stop myself if you make anymore moves. But it's over. You've fallen asleep, breathing heavily as you still nuzzle my chest.

Sleep will not come easily for me however, as I am still very aroused.

Perhaps I need to slip away and take a quick shower, but I just want to hold you for a little while longer. Maybe you'd sleep some of the drunk off.

Please wake me if you do.

* * *

Midori

It must have been 4am when I awoke abruptly with a desperate urge to pee. My room with Akane was on the main floor so I stumbled into the bathroom guided by hallway night lights and relieved myself. I was sitting there, groaning with relief when I realized that mine wasn't the only voice awake in the house.

From the pipes, I could hear that the shower upstairs was running, but that wasn't the only sound coming down, or perhaps the only thing going down.

"Mmmmhh, oh, yes" echoed the sexually excited voice of a girl.

This was it!

This was my chance to prove my theory!

As quickly and quietly as I could, I ran upstairs to wake up Mai. I needed a co-witness or else nobody would believe me. Mikoto had not yet wound herself around Mai so it was not a challenge to get her out of the room as the little girl slept hard.

"Midori, what's the emergency." Mai yawned as I pulled her out of her room. A sigh could be heard from behind the screen of the bathroom. Her eyes popped open and she followed me to the entrance and placed her ear upon the door.

"Is that them?" she exclaimed quietly as more sounds of pleasure sounded.

"Mmmhmm, oh yes, ahhh please!" The voice begged. I covered my mouth with my hand to block my laughter.

"See, I told you! I should have taken bets!" I quietly exclaimed victoriously with my arms raised above my head.

"On what?" A familiar, husky voice chimed in.

Natsuki?

"Holy FUDGE!" Mai said probably a little louder than she intended.

"If you're there, who the hell's in there with Shizuru?" I asked with shock in my voice.

"Shizuru? She's asleep, what the hell are you idiots going on about?"

She then stuck her head against the door, just in time for the mystery to be solved.

"Oh yes! Yukino, I'm going!"

"Coming" a softer voice corrected.

"Haruka?" We all said at once. I fell back in shock and looked back at the other girls who were equally stunned. I couldn't take it; I just couldn't take it anymore. I HAD to laugh, but then we'd be caught.

The water tap turned off, we all had to run! I was not alone when I took flight down the stairs, dashing towards the back door towards the pool. I ran as fast as I could while holding my breath, I made it past the pool and into the mouth of the forest behind us before I gave out. Mai had already given up as she dragged herself behind me heaving and squeaking. I let go.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah Haaaaaaaaa!" I fell on my knees and clutched my stomach and howled and cried. Mai was on the ground in equally bad shape. Natsuki on the other hand was not laughing at all.

"Idiots!" she kept repeating. Mai grasped her on the shoulder and tried to look composed again. That lasted about a second before she fell back into uncontrollable laughter.

Man I was tired after about five minutes of that.

"Why the hell were you guys doing that? That was NOBODY's business!" She accused at us with finger pointed.

"Why are you so mad?" Mai asked wiping the tears from her eyes. "It's not like we caught you and Shizuru in the shower."

"Wha-what!" she stammered. The dawn was in the distance, but if there had been lighter outside, we likely would have seen her face turn a bright tomato red. "Why would I be in the shower with Shizuru?"

"You guys are totally a couple!" I chipped in with a wide smile. "I know we walked in on something when we got back. It was written all over your face."

Her jaw dropped and she turned around and threw her face into her hands. Busted.

"Fffffffuck," she whispered. "Nobody was supposed to know yet."

"I don't think anybody else does." Mai volunteered. I didn't even know you were together until you just informed me now."

Natsuki turned back around and gave a hard expression at Mai. Her face was full of suspicion as if she was scrutinizing if the carrot haired girl was telling the truth, and then her eyes burst open as if to some realization.

"Yukino knows!" she finally snarled, with her face full of anger. "That bitch, that's what she was going on about!"

"Huh?" I said in my confusion. Mai's face matched my sentiment.

"How would Yukino know?" She added.

She then explained to us that late in the evening, Yukino, who with teary eyes implored Natsuki to go outside to talk with her. She said that Yukino wanted to ask for her forgiveness for some matter she did not wish to share with us. Man, Yukino must have been delirious to have said what she did next. Natsuki must have been pretty drunk to go along with it.

"She said 'there's a wish at the bottom of this bottle Natsuki. Even if you don't forgive me, I'm still offering you the chance to have it. You just have to be the one to take the last sip. I don't know why I went along with her. I think I was just sick of being angry with her. But ya know, come to think of it, I didn't see her actually finish more than two shots, and my glass seemed perpetually full."

"What the heck does this have anything to do with her knowing you are with Shizuru" I finally cut in since if there was a point in that entire story, it was going over my head.

"It makes sense now why she mentioned after my last drink that Shizuru was the last person to drink from the elixir last night. That was when I ran upstairs to vomit and she probably took the last drink. She fucking used me AGAIN for Haruka!"

"Yukino wished on an empty bottle of booze that she could have sex with Haruka?" Mai said sarcastically. "That's really dumb Natsuki. You really think that?"

I decided to go with the flow and add my conclusions.

"No-no-no, it makes perfect sense Mai. It was liquid courage, I know about these things girls. It sounds like Yukino needed some to approach Haruka who was probably drunk enough to actually go for it."

"And she bulldozed over me to get what she wanted."

I'm not entirely certain what she was referring to, but whatever grudge Natsuki had on Yukino was in full force. I wondered if it meant that something would have happened tonight between Natsuki and Shizuru if the grumpy girl hadn't gone to bed piss drunk. Hmmm…that would have been fun to listen in on.

Anyway, we all returned to our bedrooms once we were certain that nobody was roaming about the house.

The next morning after breakfast, we all piled into the van again to take the long journey home.

There was total afterglow on Yukino and Haruka though they tried to act as if nothing happened. Orgasms always make a girl look prettier, I captured the image of them sleeping since I didn't return to slumber once I was back in my room. Haruka was on her back with her arm around Yukino who was wrapped around the larger girl's body, they looked so peaceful.

Shizuru thanked us all for making it, but I'll bet she sure was glad to see us go. Natsuki was not dressed for a bike ride yet, so I presumed she'd be spending the day here. The thought made me grin. When I had the chance to speak to Natsuki out of earshot from anybody else, I embraced her quickly and gave her the cardinal rule about having sex with another woman.

"Make sure your fingernails are smooth and short."

HA! The dirty look she gave me was priceless. Oh Natsuki, she will eternally be fun to tease.

I wondered if Shizuru will show her the picture I took of them this morning. I crept into their bedroom to take the planned photograph. It was totally cute. Shizuru was lying on her side with Natsuki spooning her from behind. I thought I had gotten away with it when I began to walk out of the room, I heard a voice clear her throat. It was Fujino.

"Email me that picture, I want a copy," was all she said before she waved out of the room.

It was a pretty great weekend. Good drinks, good laughs, great friends. We drove away; I at the driver's seat of course as the two remaining girls stood in the doorway and watched us leave. I ignored everything anybody was saying. Ignored the sound of Akane bitching about the mystery cocks she couldn't wash off her hands this morning. My focus was on the rear view mirror, waiting to see something good happen. I have an instinct for these things, and I was not disappointed.

A purple clad arm wrapped slipped around the waist of Princess Grumpy who was pulled inside.

"Good Luck Natsuki" I thought, as my eyes went forward and the door shut at the Fujino house.

The End

* * *

Does anybody actually need for a full sex scene to feel that this story is complete? I'll leave the ending at here unless there are a lot of objections. Then I'll write a very descriptive account of what happened after the HiME gang left.

Oh, and if you're wondering why the heck the drunk girl ended up being Yukino, then read "Lips which I have loved" the prequel to this story and hopefully it should make sense.


	7. Epilogue A: Repeatedly until

Thanks again CrazyNinjaPenguin, especially given the length and content.

To the reader: This is my first time writing sexually explicit content, but I will get better over time :P This is part one of two of the epilogue.

* * *

Desired Constellation

Epilogue Part A. Repeatedly until…

Natsuki

They left just after 11am, but I had been awake since seven. I got up and quickly showered before returning to the bedroom, you were still sleeping.

I remembered the night before, how you took care of me even though it seemed like we were planning to…well, you didn't take advantage of me. The thought of you acting compassionately towards me welled a warm feeling in my chest as I looked over you sleeping.

_So beautiful._

"Shizuru, I still want to be with you" I thought as I leaned to you from the side of the bed. You had been sleeping on your side with your hands hidden under the pillow. I kissed you gently, perchance to not wake you up, but that didn't work. Your crimson eyes burst open in surprise and you covered your mouth instantly.

"Ara, let me brush my teeth. I want to taste pleasant to you," you said blushing making me grin.

"It wasn't that bad," I replied honestly. "You use good toothpaste."

You smiled sweetly at me and withdrew the blanket then made a space for me. I crawled in next to you and shared the pillow you were laying upon and held you closely, allowing you to lay your head against my chest. How natural it felt to be so close to you. It made me wonder why I had denied us this for so long. You sighed happily.

"I'm so happy you're here" you spoke as I began to stroke your hair which was fragrant with lavender.

"Me too" I agreed and kissed the top of your head. We held each other like this for a few precious moments, and I contemplated many things. Whether or not you were disappointed in me was foremost in my mind since we didn't… I mean if I hadn't drank so much we probably would have…The thought in retrospect made me feel nervous, that if things hadn't fallen apart I would have…

We would have woken up that Sunday morning together as new lovers. My body felt warm with that thought suddenly, and I shifted my body making you aware that I was uncomfortable. You raised your head so that we were eye to eye and I saw how your face had a shy pinkish hue to it. Perhaps you were having a similar thought.

"I'm sorry about last night" I said to break the silence. "I shouldn't have drunk so much."

"Natsuki…" you began. Your free hand found mine and entwined our fingers. "Can you stay with me today? There are many reasons why last night was the wrong time for us, I realized that when you fell asleep. So…"

"I will," I answered immediately at your pause. "Thank you."

I kissed you gratefully then with our fingers still entwined, and we stayed like that even as you pushed you pushed me onto my back and lay on top of me. You let go of my hand then to adjust your body's weight above me. The action caused your pelvis to rub against my lower area. _Nononono._ I thought briefly before you settled. You sighed deeply and rested your forehead against mine. The effect caused your amber honey coloured hair to drape around our faces. You were thoughtful in expression.

"What's on your mind?" I asked. You closed your eyes briefly and gave me a wry grin.

"Well…" then you giggled. I felt a blush suddenly cause my face to become hot. I was no longer certain I wanted you to share your thoughts. "Many things are on my mind Natsuki, but at the forefront is the concern as to how much longer do we have to wait before everybody leaves."

I released the breath I hadn't realized I was holding and looked over at your side table clock to see that it was only almost eight o'clock. Damn. The girls probably would sleep until noon if we allowed it.

"Let's start breakfast shortly." I suggested. "Between showers, cleaning and packing, we could probably get them out of here before noon."

A worried look crossed your face then. "Noon?" You sat up quickly so that you were kneeling astride legs. I sat up with you. "Gods, I need to go take a cold shower if I'm going to last until then. Natsuki, I dreamed of you all night long." Your face was intense as both of your hands held my head. "Every time it seemed like we were about to be together, there was always some obstacle that would stop us…"

I felt really bad for you, Shizuru, as you ranted. It made me wonder if there was something I could do for you to make you believe that I wanted this too. I realized then that the way we were sitting together was not too dissimilar to something I had read not too long ago.

"Shizuru" I stopped your rant. "How quiet do you think you can be?"

You looked taken aback. "Quiet?"

My hands reached around your body and cupped your butt cheeks and beckoned you up. The gesture took you by surprise. "Natsuki, what are you doing?"

I caressed your legs gently as I explained. "Well, we seem to have a couple of options. The first is that for the next few hours, we tough it out given we have the rest of the day. However…"

"However" you echoed in a soft purr, enjoying the feel of my skin against you.

"It seems to me that you've been toughing it out for a while. Maybe there's a way I can make this easier for you."

My left hand continued to stroke your thighs, your butt, your lower back. My right caressed your hip, down your stomach to your pelvis until I reached the apex of your womanhood over your underwear. Your eyes bulged open and mouth dropped as you inhaled sharply. I was concerned my actions were frightening you.

"Natsuki?" you exhaled. Tentatively, my fingers traced lower the outer sides of your lady parts.

"Shizuru, is this okay? Would this help you?" I asked, using my free hand to hold you closer to me and I was talking against your lips.

"Uh-huh" you pleaded and pressed your lips to mine forcefully. I cupped your centre and began to rub you gently. I wasn't absolutely certain if I was touching you right, but soon you began to rock against my palm assisting me. You held your arms around my shoulders and whispered my name repeatedly, and I watched you with adoration as your breathing became steadily faster, your thrusts against me increasingly urgent. Your panties became so wet, and I imagined that the fabric between us disappeared and I could feel more of you.

"Gods, you feel so good!" you exclaimed hoarsely, with drops of perspiration beginning to form on your forehead. Your eyes were closed. "Natsuki, oh gods, Natsuki!"

My own breathing, I hadn't realized had quickened also. Your display for me was so freakin' sexy. I wanted to watch you reach that peak for me again, I wasn't ready for it yesterday, but at this moment, I wanted to experience you with open eyes. I didn't think I was going to have to wait much longer as your fingers began to press into my back, and your breathing became high pitched.

"Shizuru" I whispered and kissed your uplifted chin. A cute moan emerged from you followed by a shudder with your mouth wide open. Your thighs clenched against my hand as you jerked against me for long seconds as you slowly began to calm down. I claimed your lips then and felt you rise once more before your body became limp and I held you up by the strength of my one arm. "Beautiful Shizuru"

Gently but deeply, we kissed. I moved my wet hand from the grasp of your thighs and held you from behind once again with my other hand and our kiss became a strong embrace. You sat completely on my lap with your head on my shoulder.

"You're wonderful; thank you."

"It's my promise for later things." I volunteered rubbing your back. "I want this for us too."

Anyway, so I was fucking aroused.

That's the best way to describe my feeling for the remaining hours we had to host company. I tried to act as relaxed as I could, even when you sat next to me for the meal and held my hand under the table. You didn't do anything more, but the feel of you caused my body to feel wistful; self pity that this was all I could have at the moment.

Midori was kind enough to rush along the sleepy girls, including one dog faced bitch that is not important to this story and before long, breakfast was over and they were packing back into the van.

I wished well the people that I like including Midori who had a lewd comment for me before she hopped back into the drivers' seat. Of course my fingernails were short. I found it hard to be angry with her however, as she left us with a nice bottle of red wine as a thank you for the weekend. Well, Shizuru said it was good, I don't know these things, but we made a plan to drink it later that night during dinner.

As they drove away, it suddenly occurred to me that we were now finally alone. It made me nervous, yet excited. I'd learned things in the past week that I wanted to try with you, that I wanted to become good at.

How foreign I had become to myself; to go from evading romantic encounters at all cost to acknowledging that I have lustful feelings. I suppose it's a part of growing up, and maybe I like it.

We were standing in the doorway not touching. In the distance, the clouds were darkening and it was certain to rain. You spoke out about it.

"The girls will be driving home in the rain. Even if you wanted to leave, the gods have decided that you should stay with me. "

I've driven plenty of times in poor weather conditions. I wasn't going to argue that with you now though.

"Sometimes the gods know best I suppose," I agreed, seeing you slowly inching closer to me the further the van got in the distance. "So…what happens next?"

"I'm going to kiss you Natsuki." You spoke honestly. Your face was straight, still staring off at our former company. A moment passed before you finished that thought. "Everywhere."

I blushed in embarrassment. "Err. Well, I don't know. That could be weird."

"Why is it weird?" You asked immediately. "Why shouldn't I want to know the person I love in all ways? Should I not want to learn every way that gives her…you pleasure."

I mentally kicked myself in the ass for opening up this line of questioning. I know that oral sex is something that a lot of people do; I just wasn't certain how to best communicate my discomfort at the idea of having it done to me.

"Aah," I began. I couldn't look at your face. Your eyes were upon me now and I suddenly wished that van would turn around and interrupt us again.

"Hmm?"

"Well, I don't know. What if I don't taste good? What if it feels strange?"

You were wearing a purple kimono. Your arm slid around my waist and pulled us inside the house shutting the door behind us. "Natsuki," you took my hand and led me to the couch and sat us so we were facing each other. Your voice was very gentle, very earnest. "I won't do anything to you that you don't want, but I would be grateful to you if you would let me try them before you decide you don't like it."

You kissed my knuckles and held them to your lips. There was pleading in your eyes, an expression I've always found difficult to say no to.

"Well…okay." I acquiesced. I believed you would stop if I asked you to. A warm smile spread across your face, and I couldn't help but allow it to cross mine as well.

You put my hand down then and touched my arms. I was wearing the white sweater I wore last night; you began tugging on the sleeves. "Can we take this off of you now?" You asked. My heart thumped loudly against my chest. I wasn't wearing anything beneath it, yet still I raised my arms and allowed you to pull the fabric over my head. Heat crept up my neck from my chest as I realized after you dropped the sweater onto the floor that you were staring shamelessly at my breasts. "My goddess" you sighed and sat closer to me.

Your hands went to my waist as your lips went to my left shoulder. You kissed me there and around my neck to my other shoulder as your one hand began drawing along my sides, and across my tummy. You then pressed your body against me so that we fell back onto the couch, beginning your loving assault on my lips. You were held up by one elbow so that you still had one free hand to roam over my body, tracing the outline of my boob. I exhaled sharply into your mouth as you allowed your palm to trace over my nipple, which sent a jolt down my body into my lower regions.

My breathing was heavy as you abandoned my lips and you kissed down my neck, pausing to lick the skin every so often as you shifted yourself so that your face was positioned just above my chest. I looked down at you; your eyes were rapt with fascination in what you were staring at. Your hands cusped around the sides of my breasts and brought the pair together causing your eyes to pop open to how close to your face they were. I almost wanted to laugh at your exploring until you placed your warm wet mouth over my right nipple. You teased it in circles with your tongue and I arched forward into your mouth as you grazed your teeth over the sensitive surface.

You enjoyed them for a long while. In the meantime, I began to feel my thighs begin to feel moist, as if either I was sweating there, or I was leaking through my panties. I felt like placing your hand there to let you feel what you had done to me but the idea made me feel shy and I figured that I should let you do what you wanted, when you wanted.

"Natsuki" you said with a breathy voice. "I'm going onto the floor now." You eased yourself onto the carpeted surface and twisted my knees so that my feet touched the floor. I adjusted my body so that I was now seated. You were before my knees.

You kissed my tummy as your fingers found the button on my skirt and deftly undid it and without asking, you tugged downwards. I raised my hips so that you could pull both my skirt and panties down and soon I was before you, utterly nude.

I stopped breathing, I was nervous. You looked up at me as you pulled my legs apart and brought yourself between them so that my chest was pressed up against your clothed one. You kissed my lips softly as you bore your crimson eyes into mine and we breathed together as your hand caressed my inner thigh and drew a line inward towards my most private area.

We gasped together as a single finger touched my sex, collecting moisture. It created a wet sound. "Natsuki, you're so aroused!" you exclaimed throatily.

"Mhmm" was the only response I could give as you touched a very sensitive place.

"I have to taste you!"

You drew back and raised my knees so that my left leg was rested over your shoulders. You kissed my thighs and slowly your face crept closer to your prize. I watched your tongue curl out of your mouth and you took a long slow lick from me. I opened my mouth and took in a breath from the sensation. It was…weird, but good. You made an 'mmmm' sound before you took another sample, first with your tongue, but soon you placed your entire mouth around me. "You taste so good." You mumbled.

My mind was unreasonably active suddenly, and it occurred to me that I'd never had an orgasm before. You felt so good the way you used your lips, your tongue but I remembered how easily it seemed to happen for you; the state of crisis you seemed to be in before you just let it go. I didn't know what to say, how to breathe. My head began to spin as I let go of breath, then inhaled again and held it. The room was quiet but for the sound of you eagerly 'eating me out.' Oh, you were incredible, your tongue was swirling about my clit, but I needed you to stop, the sensation was just too much.

I grasped your head and you looked up in surprise. I had to suppress laughter as the skin around your lips was glazed like a donut. "Shizuru, I need a break" I stated pulling my hips back. "You feel really good, but I'm so dizzy."

A hurt look crossed your eyes as my leg touched ground again.

"Am I doing it wrong? Was I hurting you?" your voice was so insecure. Immediately, I leaned to you and pulled you into a strong hug.

"No, it's not you. I just don't know what I'm supposed to be doing. Really, I loved the way you felt Shizuru. You can try that again later, but for now I need a break."

You gave a resigned sigh as you held me. I didn't know what to say to you then to make you feel better about this. You said you would stop if I asked you to, and you did. I guess we never stipulated that you had to be happy about it. I'm certain you were feeling that it reflected upon your sexual performance, the thought occurred to me that if I could see how you did it; maybe I could learn how to 'complete' also.

"Let me touch you" I asked, pulling back and looking in your sad face. "I don't know how to let go like you can. But you can teach me by letting me see it happen for you again."

You seemed surprised by my proposal, your eyebrows raised slightly. I didn't give you time to respond before I held the back of your head and beckoned your lips to me. I nibbled around your mouth, tasting myself on you, an interesting flavour but not unpleasant. Soon your tongue demanded entrance, and I allowed you to control the kiss as my hands travelled to your sash, untwisting the tie to release its binding to you. It was not difficult, and soon I was pulling your kimono off your shoulders as you remained kneeled before me.

Outside, it lightly began to rain, visible through the many windows in this room.

The kimono fell to the floor behind you revealing that you were completely nude beneath it. You were still, allowing me to gaze upon you; your skin the colour of a pale peach, utterly flawless; the generous mounds of your breasts with perky rose coloured nipples; the lean tummy directing downwards to the sparkling amethyst jewel decorating your naval and lower to the light brown patch of your pubic hair. My mouth fell open, stunned by your beauty. I wanted to touch all of it, I reached for your shoulders with splayed fingers and traced downwards and caressed your outline. Soft.

"Perfect" I whispered, causing you to blush for me once again, and you licked your lips as you pursed them, making you seem utterly cute to me.

I reached next to me and tossed the throw pillow onto the floor; that was where I would have you.

"Lie over there." I demanded gently squeezing your hand briefly.

"Okay" was all you said demurely. You scootched your butt back a bit and lay on the white carpet with your head on the pillow. I moved with you, placing my knees on the floor and crawled towards you. I allowed my eyes to admire your body as I covered you. My knees and elbows held my weight and closed my eyes as I realized how blissful it felt to be against you skin on skin. When I opened them, you were looking up at me with a sweet smile.

"So you've never had an orgasm before?" you asked as your hands which were around me began caressing my back.

"No." I answered honestly. "How do you do it?"

"It's not something you have to do. It kind of just happens. I guess it helps if you are relaxed and remember to breathe."

"Relax and breathe." I echoed. You raised your head and licked my lips then catching me a bit by surprise. I followed your head downwards and loved your lips tenderly as the first rumble of thunder sounded in the distance.

My thoughts went to the challenge I had issued myself that I was going to get you off. Both times it had happened in the past 28 hours we were fully clothed. Now, there was so much more of you available to me, I wasn't certain where to begin. I supposed that I could do as you tried with me; I was not adverse to the idea of trying to go down on you. I began by kissing down your neck and found a very sensitive point around the skin below your ear. You held me tighter and moaned as I kissed you there and I wondered how many parts of you I could find that would excite you so much.

I travelled down your body until I was just above your breasts. I kissed your left nipple immediately while caressing your right breast with my hand. "Oh!" you sighed, digging your fingers into my scalp as I let my tongue swirl around the tip then gentle sucking motions leaving a deep red mark when I removed my mouth to move to the next. It was enjoyable for me to play with you there, but there was so much flesh yet to explore. I travelled lower and applied soft lips against various areas of your tummy, discovering that your hips are very sensitive for you, as well as your loins. I could smell your sweet musky fragrance from here and I knew at that moment that indeed I wanted to give you the most intimate of kisses.

I sat between your knees and raised your left thigh to my shoulder so that I could kiss your inner knee. The effect spread you apart slightly so that I could see the different parts of your womanhood. Your lighter coloured pubic hair was short covering your mound and part of your outer lips. I reached to them to spread them so I could get a better look at the rest of it. You were glistening with moisture. The inner lips were slightly flared like butterfly wings, and everything was a dark hue of pink. At the apex of the inner lips was your hooded clitoris, while lower down was your entrance. Not that it was wide open and smiling at me, but I recognized it for what it was.

"Pretty." I observed. You sat up on your elbows and gave me a quirky grin.

"Is it?" You said with a hint of a giggle in your voice. I smiled back at you.

"Let me know if I do anything wrong okay. I want it to feel good for you."

The smile left your face and was replaced by a look of wonder as our eyes locked and I adjusted my body and began to lower my face down to you. Your eyes became progressively wider the closer to you I came and then I couldn't see you anymore as I focused on where I was. I stuck out my tongue and reached out to touch just beneath your clit. I traced the little lips downwards and up again on the opposite side and you gasped loudly in pleasure. Your fluid coated my tongue, a unique flavour I can only compare to the nectar of honeydew.

"Natsuki..." you sighed and thrust your pelvis upwards into my face, allowing me greater access. _Relax and breathe._ Your words echoed in my head as I listened to your breathing go from varying periods of being quick to deep inhales. In time I wrapped my mouth around your clit and sucked gently and the expletives began falling out of your mouth. "Fuuuuuck!" You arched forwards, causing your breasts to heave up and back to my attention. I reached up and grasped a very hard nipple and gently began to tug on it until you demanded I squeeze it harder.

Your breathing became deeper as I swirled around your bud, then progressively faster which I used as a measure of speed for how I paced the flicking of my tongue. You became very vocal in between breaths,

"Natsuki…mmm…oh please…ohhh." You were incredibly sexy; the pitch of your voice becoming higher, your thighs around my ears began to quiver. Your sex became increasingly juicy as I could feel on my chin, which also had the privilege of feeling as you began to clench beneath it. You were so close my dear…

"Stop!" You cried out suddenly, reaching up to my ears and wrenching my head up from its place. I was stunned.

"What the fuck Shizuru!" I exclaimed in frustration. You reached around me and pulled me on top of you again. Your face was very red, your eyes were watery. You kissed me harshly for a brief second, your breathing was ragged.

"Natsuki, I need one more thing from you." Your voice was a plea. You took my right hand and led it back down to your mound and pressed against me. "Please, I need you to accept what I have to give you."

I didn't get it at first as I began to let my fingers take in your moisture. You pushed my fingers lower, and then I understood what you meant.

"Inside?" I asked looking in your eyes. And you only nodded and bit your bottom lip as I proceeded to the entrance. I started with one finger and tried to slide it inside of you, but I was met with resistance. I thought I was just doing it wrong.

"Just push it in" you begged. I gave some extra force and you clenched strongly around my finger with your walls and realized what I had done. You whimpered and held me tightly.

"Shi-Shizuru. Was that your first…uh?" I stammered, holding my finger still inside you.

"Natsuki" you cried. "I only ever loved you. I couldn't be with anyone else!"

My heart skipped a beat at your words. How long had you been in love with me Shizuru? How long had you wished to be touched while I ignored you then made you feel unlovable? Sadness panged at my chest, but only for a split second given way for joy…tenderness…something more perhaps, that you chose me, the least deserving of your affections when you have so many fangirls.

You love me. I don't understand.

I kissed you sweetly while boring as deeply into you exploring this unknown area. At the far back of you was a smooth area. When I withdrew downward a bit, there was soft spongy tissue and then a ridged area towards your entrance. I withdrew completely and squeezed my fingers together to try to enter you with two digits. You winced so I moved slowly and as soon as I passed through the narrow passage- way, my thumb was able to start playing with your nerve rich centre.

My first thrusts were slow and shallow; you could barely make noise and I realized that you were holding your breath.

"Breathe love" I asked, looking into your face, bumping against that smooth spot deep inside you.

"Natsuki!" you exhaled when you finally took that breath. "I feel you…" Your eyes closed tightly as I curled my fingers forward and stroked your inner ridges.

"It's so warm inside you" I sighed as my hand became more firm with you. "You're so beautiful Shizuru." Your eyes locked onto mine, they were dark, and glassy.

"Natsuki" you gasped. Your face was red with a light film of sweat on your brows which were scrunching together as your breath became faster and more even, your mouth was open. The muscles of your sex began to grip my fingers but I kept thrusting into you, and thumbing your clit in time with your breathing.

"So warm," I repeated, looking upon you with utter adoration. "I love you."

You were lying beneath me when your back arched upward and your hands dug harshly into my back. Your walls fluttered around me as I caressed the hard little nub and it took several seconds for you to find your voice as your jaw dropped wide open while your eyes closed tightly.

A deep cry finally emerged, but it wasn't like any I'd heard from you before. It was a broken sound that was part panic, and possibly pain. You pushed your head against my chest and shook against me as I slowed my thumb to a stop causing you to release a high toned whine and then a sob. You were crying.

Oh fuck.

I lay on my side and held you to me as you continued to sob. "I'm so sorry Shizuru" I cried feeling very guilty. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

You lifted your head then, revealing your red flushed face that was streaked with tears. "No, you didn't hurt me at all. You were incredible."

I was confused, but you didn't elaborate. Instead, you rested your head into my neck and held me closer to you. I caressed your body gently as your breathing began to become calm. I realized then that although it was raining quite hard, that we hadn't had any thunder in a while so likely the storm had passed us by. I tried to move so I could look out the window behind you but you laid a firm grip around my ribs, refusing to let me.

"Natsuki" you said with your head still below my neck. You then rose it and shared the small pillow with me. "I didn't realize that having a really good orgasm could make me cry."

"Baka, you had me worried." I confessed, trying to sound indignant, but I know it came out sounding anything but. "What happened?"

"I felt it start here." You reached to your chest and covered your heart. "I was thinking that this was what I had always wanted, and now here you are all around me and inside me at once. Your voice was the thing that took me over the edge…It was everything you were doing to me…"

Your face was very peaceful, but also sleepy looking. All of our activity had actually made me feel exhausted as well. Lying on the floor felt nice, because you were with me but I thought a nap in an actual bed sounded splendid.

I proposed to you that we go upstairs and cuddle in bed and have a short sleep together. You didn't object, and while still unclothed, we walked upstairs hand in hand and lay down beneath the bedding. We kissed and touched each other quite innocently and soon you turned around so that we could spoon with your body fit against mine. It was a good feeling.

"Have a nice sleep my Natsuki" you wished, putting your arm back and stroking my leg.

"You too" I replied, resting my head against your back. "I love you."

I didn't forget I had said it Shizuru. It was my last thought before unconsciousness claimed me.

I love you.


	8. The Desired Constellation Appears

Thank you one last time to CrazyNinjaPenguin for editting my story. I don't own any part of Mai Hime, but its been fun to write about it.

I don't know what kind of ending anybody wanted, but this is the version that I liked the best so I hope you enjoy it.

Desired Constellation

Epilogue 2-The Desired Constellation Appears

To my beloved Shizuru,

First, I want you to know that I love you and that this is not goodbye forever. It will be difficult for you to find me, and while I know you are resourceful, I beseech you to not seek me out. My decision is a difficult one and I'm afraid my resolve will break if I see you again too soon.

I haven't been happy with myself lately...

I very much want to blame you for what I have become, but I know that truly it is of my own doing. It is affecting my job, my friendships, and likely even you.

You see, three years ago, I came to you looking to explore the potential of our relationship. I thought maybe, since I was a colder person back then, we would take things slowly. What I didn't realize was that there was a monster living beneath my icy surface that was unleashed when you warmed me over. Since then I have been a slave to its endless hunger.

Every morning I wake up seeking you, whether we have spent the night together or not. I crave you right then and there, and if I can't have you I spend my days lost in sexual thoughts. I am embarrassed to say that it has been more than a few times I've been caught lewdly sucking my thumb.

Remember that red-eye flight to Hawaii last spring when I was lying with my head on your lap pretending to sleep? We were covered in blankets and you struggled so hard to keep still and quiet when my hand reached beneath your skirt and I plunged my fingers deep inside you. I was quite disappointed when you came so quickly, but my efforts were soon rewarded when you dragged me into the restroom and covered my mouth with one hand while fucking me with the other. You breathed into my ear, "You just can't control yourself, can you my Natsuki?"

Since then I've come to realize that I cannot.

I'll never forget the look in your eyes the last time I tried to have you in a public space. Last week at your parents house when you slapped my hand under the dinner table and you looked so disappointed in me. It was then I realized the indignity of my actions and that maybe I needed help.

I've gone to India to study under a Yogi to learn how to control my libido.

When I return, I'll be a better person, one who can look at you without also envisioning you naked.

I love you Shizuru,

I'll return in One year.

All my love,

Natsuki

* * *

Two months later on a starry night atop a cold and snowy mountain

"...Fuck it..."

* * *

The End


End file.
